Inexpressive…
Life taking shift in each and every moment, facing different situation, knowing different people. Culture we grew up in and the thoughts we carried along, differs with the change of place. Aware of the things happening around, conscious of how and what, but unaware of why?
Life is not easy but always felt that it was not too difficult either. No matter what, always thought being positive I could win the world. Sadly, world has different phenomena, it plays by it’s own rule and sets its own target. We all have our own role to play, and we will until we realize the real purpose of our existence. Gave suggestion not because I thought I knew everything but I felt this is the way to learn and be good in life. Now i am in a situation where I am forced to think if I have any value of my existence. I argue, act childish and give a wrong signal to people to flirt with, which I recently realized. I hope I am not doing that on purpose.
A subject of humiliation, no matter what you do, always incomplete and worst. Comparing and judging on the basis of what you have, your attitude and behavior. At the end of the day, we are all humans, falling, failing, crying eventually we will learn to become a better person. It is true that it is difficult to listen, to have patience and to let go things from one end to other. But words hurt, it cuts you wide open and there is no cure. All you are left with- is the unstable mind and fickle heart.
Especially when you don’t know whom to pour your feelings and what? whom to trust and whom not to? everybody is around for your happiness but for what reason? Even I am confused on my own, I am hurt, obviously not a slutty, witty or worst but may be less intellectual than I thought I was. Consoling myself with the tears rolling out, it is for my good to be a better person tomorrow, to stand tall and strong. It’s okay, will go through this, a day will come when I be no longer how I am now, probably fierce and willful with a bit of brain may be. Be Positive, they say! Sadly, I am O Positive. LOL!